Your mom sent me a picture of you today.  It’s a really nice picture, in it your smiling.  I like that.

Jason, I miss his smile

I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately, that in and of itself is nothing new though really now is it?  I’ve also been thinking a lot about the relationship advice you gave me once.  When I first read that IM I thought your way of thinking was a little strange since relationships take time to evolve to that point.  Then I met someone and all of a sudden it made so much sense to me!

I wish you were here so we could talk about this.  I miss having you around, especially when I feel as if I need you the most.  I know it’s terribly selfish of me, I’m not the only one who’s missing you these days.  Like your mom.  I like your mom, she’s really nice!  She’s been a wonderful source of strength for me trough all of this.  Countless other people have been nothing short of amazing as well.  Hearing from your mom makes it a little easier to cope.  The one year anniversary of your death is creeping up on me real fast these days.

I’m not sure how I’m going to handle that.  Feels like it was only yesterday some days.  Others  feel as if it’s been longer then that, if that makes any sense?  I finally got around to getting a picture of you printed.  It’s hanging up on my wall in my bedroom.  It’s comforting to me, feels like your closer then you really are.  Sometimes I can almost sense your presence giving me strength when I feel like I have none left.  Thank you for that, I love you!  I miss you so much Jason, and I always will.

Love,

Steph